The world stood still
What about 2020? Our 2020 will be full of accomplishments! It hit us hard, all of us, out of nothing! We could have never imagined that this would happen. The whole world slowed down, went inside and locked their doors. This is probably the most unique event we will ever experience in our lifetime. It was the beginning of March. This is one of those moments in time that you will remember! We all had different experiences.
Some of us had personal losses: people, jobs, relationships. Some gained new things: online friends, hobbies, new opportunities Some didn’t even notice a difference for themselves, but saw others with an abundance of time exploring their restricted world and discovering new things.
For me, looking back, this was both a very awesome and a very difficult period. We enjoyed the time we had with each other. No obligations, no interference just the 4 of us. We decided to take advantage of this unprecedented time and do something together every day. We ended up reading. 30 minutes in a self-development book. Then we sat together. Mostly in the garden because the weather was beautiful. And we told each other what we just read.
We gained momentum
It was a magical time for me, one that I will never forget. It gave us a connection on another level, we grew together and when you grow, you’re happy. That is what I felt at the time. The sun was shining, we had a purpose every day. We shared our new gained knowledge and I was sure we were going to do something with it. We gained momentum and then all of a sudden, everything came to a still stand again.
The message came that my father in law, who resided in an elderly home, tested positive for Covid-19. We didn’t see him for 2,5 months, because the care homes were closed for visitors to protect the residents. But it felt like he was trapped and we couldn’t get to him. We did have some zoom-calls, but we noticed that his hearing was a barrier, as was his dementia.
He was fully aware of the consequences
We called the home every day and at first we got some uplifting messages that he was ok, had eaten, had slept. And then things turned for the worst and we were allowed to visit him. This was bad news, but at the same time, we were thankful for it. Too many people died without seeing there loved ones. We got the chance to say goodbye albeit fully dressed with an apron, gloves, a hairnet, safety goggles and a face mask. we also had the weirdest encounter that made us even laugh when we were waiting to enter his room.
Funny, the things you remember when your brain is on high alert for what is going to happen. He had asked the nurses to give him morphine to make breathing easier and calm him down. And we knew that he was fully aware of the consequence of his request. He had been a doctor in an elderly home and he knew what would happen, we understood his wish and were glad that he himself decided that this was it. So we were at peace with it and even maybe grateful that we did not have to experience his further mental decline. It was end May.
An odd day!
We lost a wonderful human being that was always there for us, for his friends, for his patients, for humanity. His spiritual testament was an unexpected gift. An inside in his motives and his purpose as he had felt it and for us it was an urgent invitation to help others, like he did. The magnitude of his desire and his drive however will be hard to match! We said goodbye to him. Only 15 people were allowed to attend the funeral.
An odd day! We normally have our loved ones with us in difficult times. And he had lots of friends that would have come but were not allowed to. He had the whole day planned out, but due to the many restrictions, we couldn’t give him what he had wanted. That is something we still need to take care of. Do not grieve he wrote, I got to the finish line. In sports, people are celebrated when they reach the finish, that is what I want you to do. In a normal situation there are lots of people that soothe you, that you can talk to, that can hug you, that reminisce. We had none of that, we had ourselves. It was strange our focus once again was on us.
In the midst of all this, Hilde and I are building our own business.
We started to pick up the pieces of our days again while feeling defeated for a while. But life goes on whether you feel good or you feel bad. You have to try to give meaning to what happened to you and grow. Those weeks of reading in the beginning of the lock down did help us manage this loss and be grateful for the many happy, sad, moving, interesting and funny moments we shared together. Times were not only sad, they were difficult as well. Both my mom and my dad were in hospital one after the other about a month after my father in law passed away. My dad could not stay alone in their home when my mom was in hospital, so my siblings and I took terms being with him 24/7. But we are still determined that our 2020 will be full of accomplishments!
Luckily they are fine now! But we discovered that they are vulnerable, more than we thought. And in the midst of all this, Hilde and I are building our own business! A thrilling adventure that we took on very consciously. We promised to feel our way through our business, because all too often, we bypass the feeling part and act on what others say or even on what we think they will say. We often get excited and inspired during our online meetings. And we have fun! Sometimes, we have an epiphany and then realize it’s the exact same things we were inspired by a month, a week or a day before. But we take that as a sign that we are on the right track.
2020 will be full of accomplishments
We do have some difficult times! Like right now. We have our first course ready, but we are not sure we have picked the correct niche and target customers. So we leave it where it is for now. Ready to be taken. We let it go for now and focus on ourselves, to know whether we need to pivot and how. And that feels good.
Off course we have mentors and coaches that are helping us in setting this up and growing our believe and our knowledge. As everything else, this is online. That means, the most influential people we know are coaching us and we are part of some powerful communities.
Our 2020 will be full of accomplishments! This year will be on our minds for the rest of our lives. We will make it unforgettable for all the right reasons! Not because of a global pandemic, but because of what we did with an unprecedented opportunity to go within and feel how we want to live our lives!
